oneword: solo
by t. zoEy benally

solo plastic cups blow, twist and swirl
dust along side the fence.
she never had the bases,
so she felt weird using the solo cups
for coffee
and only used them
for punch.

my electricity
by t. zoEy benally

electricity
tastes of wind, rain, salt, red flame
gold fields ocean rimmed

elbow-elbow-wrist-wrist-wrist
by t. zoEy benally

Navajo Barbie parks
in the da'a k'e (farm)
with a wannabe Navajo Ken
smashes corn seedlings
in four 9-inch ribbons
reduces the amount of pollen and corn
available to the people
for that year,
and compresses
air out of the soil
reducing potential
crops of squash
and beans that might otherwise grow

i've been sick
by t. zoEy benally

i've been sick since Tuesday
microorganisms have been vibrating
their gelatin existence in my left ear
for two weeks, their spewed excrement
gases boom on the opposite eardrum side
their slimed trails leading toward my left lobe

my attempts to alert primary care providers
were met with answers that could have been
intercepted from future time-space continuum by even
a 39-second psychic, who normally tries only to finish sentences
"drink lots of water and take Tylenol for the pain."
there was the implied, understood, but unsaid--WIMP

i've had little enthusiasm for meetings about feel-good projects
little enthusiasm for saving the world, one pamphet at a time
i've only seen the world through eyes clouded by the dreggy
depression brought on by the build up of bacteria
their prescense obvious every time i blow my nose
global warming, apathy, people settling for status quo...

i've been sick since Tuesday
walking in a acrid fog, clouds weighed down by heavy metals
spewed by power plants so that Phoenix, Vegas, Los Angeles
can have their television, microwaves, fans, and track lighting
i've been sick since Tuesday
but i'm getting better now.

snooze button
by t. zoEy benally

i thought i felt the credits roll
when i fell asleep last night
music slowly fade to thin trickle
watered down syrup steam

i could see the white font
credits marching up the screen
their vinyl go-go boots
equipped with silencers

so it was a big surprise
when i sat up this morning
at 6:17AM, the same scrappy
old trailer surroundings

but i had the distinct impression
of fortune, found frog skins
dance along a crumbling precipice
that i had pushed the snooze button on death

an old dude made me mad today
by t. zoEy benally

an old dude made me mad today.
i haven't been this mad since i had the old dude sitting behind me
on the airplane that kept hitting and kicking the back of the seat.
so i turned around and smiled at that old man and asked him if there was a problem.
he never said what the problem was, but i think he was mad that i was leaning my seat back.
he didn't think that although the seat in front of me was leaned back,
and the seat in front of that was leaned back, and the seat in front of that...
he didn't think that i should be allowed to lean my seat back.
actually i think he thought i was an easy target.

the old dude that made me mad today probably thought i was an easy target also.
and i was an easy target because i was under the delusion that he was a friend,
and that is the reason that i got so mad,
but i'm not going to be making that mistake anymore.
you know a person has lost an argument when they resort to personal attacks.
you know a person has lost an argument when they start contradicting themselves.
these two things happened and it made me mad.
it made me mad how easily the insults and bad mouthing rolled off this person's tongue.
it's been a long time since this person has been my friend.
this person had already judged me and had already been
harboring feelings of superiority, and feelings of arrogance.
he was just another crotchety old dude kicking the back of my chair in the airplane.

prom
by t. zoEy benally

the first guy asked me to prom the week that it was happening
but fortunately i was tiny and had my pick of the leftover smalls
a 75% off pale pink strapless covered with iridescent lace
my cousin was excited and filled her bath tub with bubbles
and roses, curled my eyelashes and feathered my hair
neither of us knew the exact formulation of gel, mousse
and hair spray that would be required to make it stick
she painted my face, tried to give the illusion to who knows who
that i wasn't really a dusty rez girl with old dancing shoes
he brought a corsage of three carnations, baby's breath
and a burgundy ribbon covering a lavender elastic band
14 year old me, until the moment he presented the corsage
in it's thin plastic case, worried about long pins poking
through flimsy material into skin

the second guy asked me several weeks in advanced
an upper classman who didn't know that i secretly hoped
his lab partner had asked me instead, and unfortunately
i later discovered that he could only declare his undying crush
on me under the cover of night and the influence of alcohol
so i bought a dress from a respected college girl and reformulated
it into something not quite vintage, but totally me
lavender lace and plum satin tiers, and a safety pin
because i hadn't quite mastered the art of alteration
he brought me white roses, bought me dinner--a girl of 15
totally out of place with seniors and juniors, our only
connection was biology class, but i wasn't out of place there
he wasn't a very good dancer, but tried to make it up
by finding a party, but i just fell asleep so he brought me home

the third guy latched onto me at a dance several months before
and wouldn't go away, so i finally just asked him to the prom
my mom hated his black trans-am, so i ended up
going with a girlfriend--i think he would have stood me up
anyway--but i ran into his mom coming home from work
and she said i was beautiful in the silver dress i had created,
i was still learning and didn't realize that i should have taken
a couple of inches off the waist, but she said i was beautiful
16 year old lovely even without a corsage...
and we danced, two girls, and then suddenly he was there
complete with another wrist corsage of red roses, silver ribbons
and we danced, danced until we didn't have a ride home

the fourth guy was my best friend, and my dress fit perfectly
constructed of white satin and black lace, he brought
unexpected blue carnations, white roses, baby's breath
and that totally appropriate elastic band, because, although
he didn't admit it until we were both in our late 20's,
he loved dancing with me

the only pictures that remain of those proms exist in my mind
i see us standing stiffly posed and i remember the spicy
carnation scent, honeyed baby's breath, slick satin ribbons
sticky grip of hairspray and mascara, i see the cheezy props
i remember sliding out of nice shoes after a night of dancing
i can feel scissor metal slice through taffeta, satin, lace and acetate
and i remember the music...

earth and sky
by t. zoEy benally

i want to write you something beautiful
i want to communicate me to you so that you will understand
and be compelled to hide a little piece of me inside your mind
communicate me then, communicate me now
so that when we are both gone from here
we might both have, the universe might have
that small whisker of understanding,
communication launched, unfettered ships, colorful flags flying
sent out into unknown, deep dark secret seas
and received, welcomed, by neighboring shores

what did i taste like back then? did i taste like honey?
my skin, lips and tongue flavored with unknown bee
thoughts, dusted yellow with flower pollen
or did i taste like wild, sticky red-gold dates
adorned with crystallized sugar lace
dipped in fresh milk still nutty, unpasteurized
or maybe i tasted like fresh bread soft, still warm
from the oven with the slightest hint of crust
fragrant with fennel seeds, light coat of butter
i wanted to taste of fertile valleys, dark earth, the future

how did it feel to travel outside map boundaries?
to hear my parched deserts call to your towering rain clouds
beckon and beg precious moisture, just short of hurricanes
how did it feel, stormy skies, whorled zephyrs
ancient code strung up spiral staircase through generations
how did it feel when platectonic plates shifted, birthing
new volcanoes, electric lightning bolts grounding in earth
rivers meniscus raised with runoff from turbulent storms
both coming to grey junctions where boundaries blur
where your atoms and molecules mix with mine

if this is beautiful--please welcome this message
encoded in yes-no bottles, carried on electron tides
if this is beautiful please accept this gift from my mind
small ribbon of time tied, threaded through heart muscle fibers
so that the blood that reaches every capillary
has been tinged with this memory fragment, melted tissue dye
coloring rouge lips, coconut shell eyes, blushed cheeks
if this is beautiful--please provide amnesty
to this criminal that holds on to and treasures
all flavors of quarks left by who you were
who i was, who we were...

hollow, filled
by t. zoEy benally

today fifteen cats were trapped by their own hunger
starved hollow, internal fleas nibbling at their innards
chortle in the greenish pink depths of carnivore gut
in between sips of plasma, meowed and scratched
from filthy cat litter that will now never be changed
tidy clay forever steeped in digest mousie juice

carved out hulls where sunlit children once danced
rattle and roll with words bellowed from wind lungs
abandoned seed husks tumble and crush beneath
gravity powered feet, rushing off into important futures
and fifteen cats share my fate, imprisoned until the end
imprisoned to prove that someone is capable of love

but potential wealth is not love for anyone except yourself
and i would wish for my future, to be lost in Columbia or to fade back
into the anise scented past, rafters pungent with dried
marjoram, thyme, lavender, chamomile, and find myself wrapped in
fragrant cotton sheets, absorbing your warmth and resting complete
beneath the squinty sun's gaze, empty cavern filled by your hope

my little pony
by t. zoEy benally

my little pony has a one trick mind
gobbles down my ideas and calls them pony's own
my little pony's borrowed ideas cascade plastic pastel
twirl enticingly down pretend pony purple cheek

my little pony has a single cell mind
regurgitates key phrases, memorized mantras
furiously scribbles notes to remind pony brain
of all the cool things to think

my little pony has unified my minions
organized them into one non-thinking blob
taught them obedience, learn them
not to creatively ponder

my little one trick pony will one day
take over the world and lead the lemming mass
marching unified, mezmerized over canyon ledges
cloned images of me