cardboard
by t. zoey benally

indian designs traverse box edges
sweet dust puffs from frayed corners
brown fibers possess boiled grits flavor
and when you tear taped seams, hollow
sounds vibrate through this conglomeration
of ninety degree angles

rant
by t. zoEy benally

i just carried a box full of records
2 miles from the post office
home in the rain, semis throwing
small chunks of mud at me

i watched my significant other zip past
one mile from home, and i knew
deep in the aching muscles
of my shoulders, forearms, biceps
tired hand tendons, no relief
that i am no more obvious to him
than a mangy stray dog
and these are HIS records!

and before that, i exchanged emails
with an instructor that scheduled
THE MOST IMPORTANT CLASS
the same day we are performing
at Sparrows Poetry Festival
despite my having informed him,
links included, several weeks before

i can see the wimpy dominoes
crashing into each other in a massive
tsunami that will wash all my work
towards graduating in May
down towards life's floor drain
where it will swirl, gathering
lost pubic hairs, dried snot
and swallow down crusted pipes
i will lose elective credits
my University of Michigan biostatistics
credits will expire, and i will end up
driving back and forth to ABQ
to retake these units, increasing
my risk of being taken out
by a glaanii, speeder
or sleepy person
on NM 550...

...and i type this trying to beat the clock
trying to slip under the wire
of the scheduled blogger outage
at 4PM PST!

one word: click
by t. zoEy benally

ninety degrees of metal bites 90 degree metal
silver teeth slide and click, crystal structure shock
corners pinch together, cubist shoulders rub
descend right angle staircases, 11 by seven

one word: pane
by t. zoEy benally

green bottles, brown bottles, clear bottles
recline atop rough cedar tree shade house beams
no doubt chopped, axe nibble, round and round
hands blistered, dribbled sweat burned eyes
now sun shines through improvised skylight
red and amber bottle pane watercolors
tortillas, roast mutton, chili, soda pop and salt

it's freaky that this word came back up on oneword again! fortunately i wrote something totally different than before.

sand under the guardrail
washed down from the hill
presumably headed to the river
small, dirty beach pooled
on concrete at the bridge edge
little pebbles and sticks lounge
no ocean waves lap, no wetness
for the pile of sand trapped
under the guardrail

i watch you with blood shot eyes
by t. zoEy benally

i watch you with blood shot eyes
left leg folded over right, a large "P"
quietly read the Japanese movie on television
remote uncharacteristically discarded
it must be a good movie

my red eyes purvey the dishes, dirty rice
steamer, piled on the table, lunch stink
sesame seed and peanut oil, sea salt
frightful mexican hot sause
all waiting to be lead away

i can finally tolerate the internet, sunlight
with my sparkly, voodoo, zombie eyes
stained crimson by a "bad migraine" (doctor's words)
or maybe viral meningitis (my idea), no, not self-diagnosing
not a hypochondriac, or dressing above my station
just comparing lists of facts, but who am i to say
that i'm not just having a 7-day migraine?

breakfast
by t. zoEy benally

if i could travel to Scottsdale in 30 minutes
i would devour a Protein Pancake
sit on cool blonde wood benches, elbows
rested on sanitized matching rectangle
pour water and tea out of sweaty carafes
stir in aspartame, sucralose, saccharin
or maybe even a packet of sugar

i would need someone to talk to
i enjoy laughter, drizzled over breakfast
brand new ideas shaken out of brains
Tabasco red flecks on eggs, hash-browns
humorous stories embellished and shared
over crunched ice, partially melted best
a brave soul unafraid of dewy morning sun

if i could talk a friend out of warm bed, into
icy cold car, onto frost lined roads
convince a friend to waste gasoline
i would be gone, disappeared to Denny's
and this time i would order a veggie omelet
i promise i would give them time to wake up
hold back my best ideas until caffeine kicks in

i would like to savor tea over dreams
with the most avid dreamers, watch them
pour cream out of tiny white plastic drums
listen to bizarre tales from night journeys
to other realities, dimensions, realms, planes
butter melted into toast, or jam pried from
square tubs, smeared into rough bread landscape

one word: pane
by t. zoEy benally

water drops crusted across
a thin silicone pane
green bug gut smeared
from injury to demise
fairy spinkles dragged by winds
my only protection from
insect protein and rain water

it's been a long month-and-a-half
by t. zoey benally

i had one super productive week right after the fair
when i look back at that week in my calendar, warm fuzzies
swarm up from the depths of my normally cold, dark heart
not really--my heart is really just a muscle bent on pumping blood
but i did get a lot done that week, resting heart rate 65 BPM

soon after this it started getting cold, but i continued to read
Salvato, the environmental health specialist bee-eye-bee-el-E
yep, that's the book to read when you need to know about everything
from Plasmodium vivax to flushometer valves to oligotrophic lakes
faithfully transported in my red Jansport, four miles each day

it was soon after the night temperature drop that i developed
my very first UTI, i dutifully ignored the symptoms and downed
cranberry juice along with my normal Surgeon General recommended
sixty-four ounces of tincture o' swirling dog, hoping that it would
just go away--but bacteria will not be ignored

i dropped significant other off at San Juan College that Saturday
the kids and i split for swimming and sushi in Durango
we swam for hours, writing messages in mineral bubbles congregated
on our arms and legs, stewed with friendly folks speaking German
the kids taught me to side stroke, i swam two pool lenghts and back

after eating sushi, we were summoned back to New Mexico, somewhere,
sometime i noticed a fine scratch feeling, behind my left ear in my hair
again i ignored the scratch feeling, i collected my best friend
and we went to watch a movie, i also watching him drink soda
while sipping my two dollar bottled water, no soda since May

Wedensday, five days after Durango, i woke up and trekked four thousands
steps southwest across Shiprock to work next to a capped tailings pile
10AM my back felt like it was going to break in half, i had to hold my breath
to keep tension, to keep muscles from collapse, my body from folding
in half, a dry deteriorating straw, cracks on fold corners, holes, useless

i survived, 103.5 degree Fahrenheit night, when i sat up, my daughter
noticed my face was all red, rash crawled down my neck
settled on my torso, then proceeded down my arms and legs
i scratched a spot on my back, blood pooled under the skin
in too-heavy-bag carrying streaks, but i had made it, i was alive

11 days later i finished Salvato, again we had sushi, but for dinner
this time, and in ABQ, not CO, a benefit of daylight savings time
is an extra hour of study! which i did with Starbucks and a blueberry
muffin--brain food! two-hundred-ten minutes flew buy, filling circles with a
a small well used number 2 pencil snatched from my son's school box

the past two weeks has been spent waiting for and receiving results
results of samples taking in October, brain and blood, processed
blood came back positive for Rickettsia rickettsii, brain performance
samples have not come back as of yet, i called last week, but they said
please wait at least four weeks for test results....