pawn me please
by t. zoEy benally

i thought about her this morning
crossed & looped brown-black shoestring tubes
tightened and pondered so many
men fearlessly wearing bows

my shoe bow daintily tied i recalled
iridescent soap bubble words
blown my way on a breathy annoyed sigh
encapsulated in circular soap film
i love you--oh yeah, by the way
floats towards my face, bursts
and soapy slobber stings my eyes

i am an accessory for her
padded drawers lined with faux velvet
she made me buy for her
burgundy because it sounded
like wine & gold toe rings
to fill the cavern where her heart could be

our coexistence is a lie
this concho belt, not the one she thought
she had me pay for
it is all i can do to not clash & contrast
midnight blue broomstick skirt she wears today

i make her look fat & sallow
my look sadly Santa Fe when she desires Scottsdale or
my eggs boldly scrambled to her order of poached
my counterpart, an eight pound squash blossom
purchased with a warm ball of Santa Domingo bread
on the side last fair

i keep track of when she puts me on
and wonder if i compliment tight wrangler paint-ons
tucked into acid-washed, pre-distressed
leather that will never hold sweet
horse manure perfume

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